For Mirth Only

human centipede, my ass

it’s very easy to say (and common to hear) “*whatever* is the WORST *whatever* i’ve EVER *seen/heard/whatever*.” it’s a huge, hyperbolic overstatement, and it’s an easy way for people to exclaim disgust for *whatever*.

the human centipede isn’t the worst movie i’ve ever seen, but i’ll be damned if it it isn’t ONE of the most awful movies i’ve ever chosen to see. i feel like i’m doing the artform of film a disservice by even calling this nonsense a movie; quite simply, i find this *thing* to be nothing. what i mean is, it’s not scary. it’s not interesting. it’s not torture porn. it’s not campy. it’s not gory. it’s not gross (except for a scene of teeth-yanking; that’s enough to give anyone shivers). it’s not good. it’s not bad. it’s not… anything. what it is, if it is something (so i guess it’s not really nothing), is shit. it’s the masturbatory work of some stupid asshole director who should have written a short story and let our imaginations run wild as opposed to bringing to life, so to speak, this crappy, unbearable, pointless, childish fantasy. he even could have drawn a little kiddie picture with crayons and fingerpaints! that would have been far more disturbing. did i mention the director’s name is tom six? i imagine that’s his pseudonym. fucking cornball.

ok, this movie is one more thing: fucking corny garbage.

folks, don’t be tempted to watch this. it’s trash. watch those hostel movies instead. those are pieces of shit, too, but they stink a little less than this one.

TOPP TRAX N MIXS, JAN-JUN 2010

no particular order

addison groove – footcrab/dumbshit
azari & III – hungry for the power, reckless with your love, manhooker
california swag district – teach me how to dougie
emika – double edge (original & pinch remix)
fat joe & young jeezy – slow down
health we are water
rolo tomassi – hysterics lp, cosmology lp
slim – break u down
the hundred in the hands – tom tom
mia & jay-z – xxxo
toro y moi – master of none
gucci mane – lemonade

rustie – fabric promo mix
girl unit – fact mix
bok bok – january 2010 mix
pinch – april dubstep mix

in color

here’s my new mix, y’all!!! the focus is on progression. lotsa tracks didn’t make the cut (no pun intended), perhaps to be properly utilized another day. i love these songs, and… i hope you like at least one of them, too. thank youuu for listeniiing!!!

in color

lil jon & lmfao – get out of your mind
autechre – arch carrier
da damn phreak noize phunk – violin madness
gorillaz – stylo
men without hats – safety dance
dva – natty
major lazer – when u hear the bassline
uffie – mcs can kiss (zombie disco squad dub)
cassy – night to remember
deadboy – u cheated
gantman – juke dat girl (greenmoney remix)
lloyd banks – beamer benz & bentley
yo gotti – women lie, men lie
health – we are water

a burial for burial

what’s with all the praise for “untrue”? it sounds like an autistic keyboard. “best album of the 2000s,” according to various blogs and such on the internet? fuck outta here. then you have all the album reviews trying to say that this embodies “the ghosts of raves past,” “the soundtrack to a rainy afternoon,” “hardcore continuum this and that,” and, if i remember correctly (i don’t), somebody likened it to “ghost in the shell”? the anime? *sigh* AND this guy remained anonymous for years and people actually gave a shit when he revealed his pasty white face. MYSTERIOUS! SUBLIME!

if you really want to experience the “ghosts of rave past” (scary, eh), listen to any drum & bass, grime, garage, dubstep, hardcore, house, techno, trance, (insert electronic genre here) mix/compilation/radio-live-set-recording from the past 20 years- it’ll be infinitely more rewarding than suffering through this malfunction of a recording.

oh! “archangel,” the first track, is astonishingly good. maybe a friend of his recorded it and snuck it in! y’know, to get sales up.

i hate this album.

bang pop

check out this awful new (official!!!) video for a single that’s FOUR YEARS OLD. i wonder how big uffie’ll get? a lot? not at all? only 2010 will tell.

e tripping

(i typed “e tripping” into google images)

eve on a benga track??? co-produced by a nas producer? according to the luis dnb timeline (method man was working with roni size in… 2000, was it?), dubstep should be around 3/5 of its lifeline??? after this comes continued, hopefully creatively vibrant penetration into the mainstream, followed by a full comeback of the original headstrong sound (such as the 2003/2004 era dnb amen choppin’ revival), followed by commercial death (back to the underground, back to niche).

or not. but the parallel’s uncanny…
Eve – “Me N My”

Luis’ Mid-Year Top 10

here you go, y’all!!! my top ten or so from january to june.

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=6EM35D9E
zip file includes:

01. Bok Bok – www.myspace.com/nightslugs VICE mix JAN 09
02. Youngsta – Seven_RINSE_219
03. Chelly – Took The Night
04. Kyla & Crazy Cousinz – www.theheatwave.co.uk/blog Do You Mind (Reggae Remix)
05. Donny – [Donny - The Fucking Offensive EP #04] They Find Me
06. Jamie Vexd – [ZIQ212 #04] Radiant Industry
07. Joker and Ginz – [KAP004] Purple City
08. Major Lazer – [Guns Don't Kill People... Lazers Do #10] Keep It Goin’ Louder feat. Nina Sky & Ricky Blaze
09. shuttle – [the vostok 1 mixtape] the vostok 1 mixtape
10. Starkey – [Miracles (Jamie Vex'd Remix) #01] Miracles (Jamie Vex’d Remix)
11. Telepathe – [Dance Mother CD1 #01] So Fine
12. Timberlee – Gunny Gunny (Schlacthofbronx RMX)

two notes:

1) the martyn + aaliyah a cappella blend in the shuttle mix has been the most blissful musical moment of the year thus far for me, and…

2) brackles – lhc (separate download). most discomforting track since skream’s “request line”? soundtrack for a dream? nightmare? you decide.

it hit me…

… after a few listens. this is where the fff dubstep needs/needed to go, not to where it went, where it’s rotting. not surprsingly, it took somebody not related to the “scene” to do it properly… and he’s in a far higher league of production, anyway.

Bjork – Nattura (Switch Remix)

LOOK AT WHAT I FOUND!!!!!

still BRUTALLY mesmerizing…

:)

Bok Bok + Manara Mixes

there’s nothing to say about this mix:
Bok Bok & Manara Mixtape for Trash Menagerie Feb 09

cuz they already write about it so well. their write-up reads like a diary entry… it’s really neat.

anyway, that mix is pretty good, though not as good as this one:
Bok Bok mini mix for vice

i went to sleep with it yesterday. it’s my morning soundtrack. it’s just fucking *good*, not “ok,” not “yeah, it’s alright”- it’s *solid*. despite some slight, unfortunate trainwrecks, the momentum it builds is quite possibly the best i’ve heard in many, many months, and as a whole, it elicits a very cold shade of gray for me. it reminds me of those murky, transfixing dnb sets i used to love with oceans of subbass and sparse neon synths and hypnotic drum loops. AND, curses’ “moss man” drops friiiiighteningly hard at 18 minutes in or so.

yeah!!!

:)